Did you think I forgot? July 1, 2009

Haven’t heard me quote Mark Batterson recently have you?  Never fear I have some for you tonight:)

Read his great post tonight about “creating margin” in our lives.  I have heard several sermons on this concept and love Andy Stanley’s take on it.  I think Stanley even wrote a book on it.

Basically it is the challenge to create space in our lives…so that we have space for creativity, adventure, rest, inspiration, or whatever we need.  Whatever GOD wants to fill it with.  I know for me I tend to naturally try to fill up every minute with something productive.  Then I am exhausted and truthfully don’t accomplish much or enjoy what I do.

I am learning this lesson a little more each year.  This past weekend I cashed in my Mother’s Day gift which was a night and day alone at the beach.  Kind of a personal/private spiritual retreat.  It was awesome!  I am so thankful for a husband that realizes how desperately I need that and how it refreshes me.

I rested, listened to music, read a ton, enjoyed the beach, slept, prayed, journaled, planned and did a little bit of shopping.  I unplugged from the internet and other things that tend to distract me.  Every so often I just need to silence the noise so I can be clearheaded and focus inward and upward.  It was pure bliss:)

So back to Batterson…he does a better job of this challenge to create margins in our lives.  It is hard to do but the better I get at it, the more freedom I find.  And I am so determined to learn this so I can raise my boys to live out this concept.  Enjoy..

One of the quantum challenges leaders face is this: as the organizations they lead start experiencing organizational growth they stop experiencing personal growth. Why? Because of the demands of the organizational growth. They start leading the organization and stop leading themselves. And that is when the blessing turns into a curse. Growth will grind to a halt. In fact, it will probably implode. You lose spiritual margin. You lose intellectual margin. You lose creative margin. And you stop growing. No Margin = No Growth.

The key to continued organizational and personal growth boils down to this: margin. You need margin to think. You need margin to play. You need margin to laugh. You need margin to dream. You need margin to have impromptu conversations. You need margin to seize unanticipated opportunities. You need margin.

One of the primary responsibilities of leaders is creating margin. It almost seems selfish. But you are doing everybody you work with a disservice if you give them everything you’ve got. You need margin. And it starts with time management. If you don’t control your calendar, your calendar will control you.

Here are a ten ways to create margin:

1) Use all of your vacation days. You owe it to yourself and your family.
2) Protect your day off religiously.
3) Don’t schedule meetings on certain days or before certain hours.
4) Delegate more responsibility.
5) Only check email during designated times during the day.
6) Get up earlier in the morning.
7) Schedule meetings with God and yourself.
Turn off the TV.
9) Get out of your organizational context and go to a conference.
10) Hit the gym. You don’t have enough time or energy NOT to work out.

Have any ideas to add to the mix? How do you create margin?

Chick-fil-A here we come! June 30, 2009

A while back I shared that I am doing the summer Bible study “Me, Myself & Lies” written by Jennifer Rothschild.  It is being coordinated through Beth Moore’s blog www.livingproofministries.blogspot.com.

This was the first week of study and I am inviting YOU to meet me at Chick-fil-A this Friday morning to chat about the study.  So if you have the book and have started…or if you have the book and plan to start:)  Join me at Chick-fil-A Friday morning, July 3rd at 10am.

We will let the kiddos play in the play area (thank goodness it is sound proof) and we will take some time to discuss what we have learned or hope to learn.  On her blog Beth Moore gives some ideas for some discussion starters so check it out if you want.

The Bible study is 6 weeks long and we will meet every other week.  So if you haven’t started run out and pick up a book for $11.95 at Lifeway Christian.  Invite a friend.  It is a great, great study so far!

Leave me a comment below if you plan to be there or send me an email at erikaivory@hotmail.com.  You can also facebook me or twitter me (erikaivory).  I am lookin’ forward to it!

I’ve Got a Friend June 15, 2009

That right there gives me a warm, secure feeling…I’ve got a friend.  Poor grammar yes, but so true.  I am blessed with some truly amazing friends.  One gal that is a kindred spirit I have known for about 8 years.  I met her when I was pregnant with my first child and she just shone.  I knew she was a Christ follower before we ever had any kind of deep conversations and before she ever verbally gave a clue that she knew our Savior.

I determined within a few days of meeting her that I wanted her to be my friend.  I went home and told Mark that I had met the neatest girl and she was going to become a very good friend.  I found opportunities to spend time with her and randomly brought her a meal when she had her second baby.  I was determined she was not going to get away:)

A little strange, yes, but so worth it because she is warm, smart, inspirational, funny, beautiful, quirky, strong and desperately in love with Jesus.  She challenges me to be a better mom, more faithful friend, more devoted wife, more passionate about my faith and most difficult at times…a better caregiver toward creation.

My incredible friend, Kara Evans, takes care of her body with intensity (she is a nationally certified yoga instructor, aerobics instructor, triathlete, certified massage therapist, health food enthusiast, lover of all things nutritious, and did I mention mother of 4) but also is an amazing advocate of living a Green lifestyle.  She spearheaded and organized an event that took place on Thursday, May 28th,  “Let’s Get Green and Healthy Florence”.  This fair highlighted vendors advocating and supporting helping Florentines live Green and Healthy.  There were massage therapists, local food establishments, grocery stores, giveaways, jumpie castles, food samples….lots of neat opportunities to learn and try out what Florence has to offer.

Kara always provides me with opportunities to learn new ways to be a better Earth dweller. She currently does massage therapy at Carte Ay in Florence.  She does an amazing job whether you are looking for deep tissue massage, some simple stress-relief or even help with a sports injury.   She has no idea that I am posting about her but if you are interested in booking a massage with her you can contact her at kevans29@sc.rr.com.  And no matter what you will be blessed just to meet the beautiful whirlwind I call my friend Kara:)

Short and sweet June 13, 2009

No I am not referring to me:)  Just kidding, cause I am certainly not sweet.  I have one more book review for you, but since I am only about 4 chapters in to the book it isn’t much of a review.  That is where short and sweet comes in.  However I have read other Sisterchicks books and loved them and this one seems to be just as great.  If you like a good read and you haven’t read anything by Robin Jones Gunn, then you have missed out, seriously!

I do love her stuff.  So check out the info below and go pick up a copy:)  I hope to be done with it soon b/c our two trips to the pool this week were so uneventful that I think I may actually get to read a bit while at the pool.  We will see how the beach goes tomorrow.  I have a feeling that will be another story:)  At least I can work out and read while doing the elliptical.  Ah I do love running while reading!

Book: Sisterchicks In Wooden Shoes

Summary: When a mammogram result comes back abnormal, midlife mama Summer Finley makes a snap decision to relegate fear to the back burner and fulfill a lifelong dream. Summer heads for Holland where she meets up with tulips, wooden shoes, and her best friend, Noelle.

Pen pals since fourth grade, Summer and Noelle have never met face-to-face. Through decades of heart-level correspondence, they have sustained a deep friendship. A week of adventure helps both women trade anxiety for a renewed and deeper trust in God. When Summer confides in Noelle about the abnormal medical report, Noelle finds the freedom to share a long-held heartache, and both women discover they needed each other more than they realized.

Women ages 35 and up, readers of Christian Boomer Lit, and fans of books such as The Yada Yada Prayer Group will enjoy Robin Jones Gunn’s humorous and uplifting style. True-to-life characters and moments of poignancy bring a deeper understanding of the value of life and the gift of true friends. Readers guide and bonus material included.

Author Bio:

Robin Jones Gunn is the best-selling and award-winning author of over seventy books, including the Glenbrooke, Christy Miller, Sierra Jensen, Katie Weldon, and Christy and Todd: The College Years teen series. The Sisterchicks® series has sold more than 300,000 units, bringing her total sales to more than 3.5 million books worldwide. A Christy Award winner, Robin is a popular speaker, both at home and abroad, and is frequently interviewed on radio and on television. www.robingunn.com www.sisterchicks.com

Cover art:

Author Photo

Calling all the ladies! June 11, 2009

Okay friends I have finally carved out a few minutes to put some real thoughts down here.  Balance…that wonderful, elusive word!  I am constantly trying to seek balance in my eating, exercising, cleaning, socializing, time with the Lord…etc.

How about you?  I think women especially struggle with this area.  We need to spend time with our husband, but not neglect the kids…play with our children, but not neglect the housework…have a heart to serve others, but make time for ourselves so we don’t end up emotionally depleted…find time to be with our friends, yet remain focused on our own families and homes.  Sheesh!  It truthfully makes me a bit crazy at times.

My greatest link to finding some sort of balance and staying sane is having consistant time with the Lord.  That does not come naturally to me (and honestly besides Oswald Chambers and John Piper, I don’t get the feeling it comes naturally to most people.)  I do testify though that when I can stick with seeking the Lord daily, so many areas in my life begin to teeter into a somewhat safe place of balance.

Over the past 16 years I have done a number of Bible studies that have taught me how rich the Word is and how powerful it is to bring peace and life to my internal world.  Many of these have been Beth Moore Bible studies.  These studies do usually include a workbook (of which I am a fan, but some people loath them) as well as some kind of small group/discussion/interaction.  However, at least three different times I have done workbook Bible studies either solely on my own, or using a computer program to give me direction and accountability.

I did a Bible study with some ladies through Trinity Pres during the school year and it reminded me of how much I love the dynamic of learning with other women and gaining from perspectives that are different than mine.  Some of these ladies encouraged me to start visiting Beth Moore’s Living Proof Ministries blog. This blog is silly, funny, spiritually challenging and different each time you visit it.

All this brings me to this: Beth Moore is hosting a summer ladies Bible study Me, Myself & Lies by Jennifer Rothschild.  It is a six week study and does have a workbook.  Here is a little synopsis of the study:

Ever wonder what you should say when you talk to yourself?  We all talk to ourselves all the time.  We evaluate everything we do, compare ourselves to others, and even call ourselves names.  We disparage who we are instead of telling ourselves the truth about who God says we are.

Me, Myself, and Lies deals with our destructive, unrealistic, self-talk.  In this study Jennifer Rothschild explores the power of self-talk.  As she takes us through the things we commonly say to ourselves, she teaches us to practice godly and biblical self-talk.

Anyone interested?  On the blog the study technically starts Tuesday, June 23, 2009.  Go here if you want to know ALL the details.  Basically, you do the Bible study on your own and then every other Tuesday you check in on the LPM blog and Beth Moore will give a little 15 minute video talk with some discussion starters.  Here is a fun part (I think), if some of you friends are interested I thought it would be fun to arrange an informal morning meeting at the Chick-fil-A play area on Irby and discuss what we have been learning while our kiddos play in the sound proof play area:)  How about them apples?

And if you don’t live nearby but let me know that you are reading this blog and are doing the study then maybe we can connect for an IM chat session on those weeks too.  Or at least create some email dialogue that provides some accountability and new perspective!  This certainly isn’t for everyone, but a lot of ladies I have talked to don’t have the time during the summer to commit to a full study but still need something to keep them growing and accountable.

So check out the info and let me know by your comment if you are interested and in.  If you do the study, definitely tune in b/c I will remind you about when we will connect at Chick-fil-A.  I already picked up my workbook from LifeWay bookstore and I did the first day of homework this afternoon.  I am starting early b/c I know that I usually get behind.  So maybe this way I can stay caught up:)

It is goooooood stuff, I tell you!  Here are a couple of nuggets to whet your appetite.  “Who you are and what’s in your heart are revealed in the words you speak.”  “The magi’s treasure chest existed to have something to give Jesus.  As we begin to speak wise words to our souls, we do so to ultimately have fitting treasure to offer our King.”  “Who I am and what I struggle with are not the same thing.”

That last one really got me.  I do try to be aware of how my words affect the people around me, particularly my children.  However, that very quickly turns into a heap of self-condemnation.  I wonder if my self-talk was based more on truth instead of self-condemnation, would it in turn affect what comes out of my mouth?  If the words in my head were full of life and I worked on changing that instead of simply controlling my mouth would I find greater victory and freedom in these areas of struggle?

I already have a lot to chew on.  So…think on it, pray on it and give me a shout out if you wanna join me?

Okay, one more… June 9, 2009

I really do have some more personal and interesting things to blog about but just not time in which to do it.  So I will, possibly this week, make time to share with you some recent home improvements, stories, summer plans and recent hobbies.

However I have a deadline to submit a blog review of Life on Planet Mom by Lisa T. Bergren on June 8, 2009.  That gives me about 8 minutes.  I actually have 2 more chapters in this book to finish but I have really enjoyed it.  It is a quick, easy read and the author is quite funny.

“Life on Planet Mom helps women navigate their world of changing relationships after becoming a mom.
With in-depth research, personal experience and expert advice, Lisa helps busy moms prioritize and
manage their relationships in six key areas: self, spouse, friends, family of origin, community and
God.”

Bergren does a great job at explaining the realities and difficulties of maintaining healthy relationships particularly during the first few years of motherhood. I wish I had read this when I was a new mom. She introduces each chapter with a scene from the lives of four friends. I found these women easy to relate to and they definitely helped me to better understand the points she brought home later in the chapters.

This would be a great book for an expectant mom or someone with little ones.  Survival is hard enough when you are balancing life with little ones and then trying to maintain healthy family relationships and friendships…well it can be downright overwhelming.  Yet I think most mo

Book for the beach June 5, 2009

I just finished a book that I couldn’t put down.  It has been a while since I have read something that kept me up late at night and made me carry it around while I did housework:)  Saints in Limbo did just that.  I so recommend it for a good summer read.  I kind of liken it a bit to The Shack, but only in the sense that it deals with the spiritual in a tangible way that is definitely not theologically correct but certainly makes you think.  It made me evaluate how my internal choices will affect my children, how I can choose to be “happy” or “not happy” and how the spiritually does indeed affect us physically.  The romantic elements to this book certainly made me more tenderhearted toward my husband and it made me take stock of my friendships.  The characters are great, and it actually left me hoping for a sequel.  I loved it! 

I have not finished the second book and it is by another author but it looks really good too.  I will let you know how that one turns out in a week or so.  I hope you will pick this book up though this summer when you are headed to the beach or the pool.  It will certainly be worth your while:)  As always I have include info about both books and their authors below!

Saints in Limbo

 http://www.randomhouse.com/catalog/display.pperl?isbn=9780307446701&ref=externallink_wbm_saintsinlimbo_eaj_0408_01

 

Stealing Home

http://www.randomhouse.com/catalog/display.pperl?isbn=9781601421364&ref=externallink_mlt_stealinghome_eaj_0408_01

 

  

 

 

Book: Saints in Limbo  

 

Author: River Jordan

  

Ever since her husband Joe died, Velma True’s world has been limited to what she can see while clinging to one of the multicolored threads tied to the porch railing of her home outside Echo, Florida.

When a mysterious stranger appears at her door on her birthday and presents Velma with a special gift, she is rattled by the object’s ability to take her into her memories–a place where Joe still lives, her son Rudy is still young, unaffected by the world’s hardness, and the beginning is closer than the end. As secrets old and new come to light, Velma wonders if it’s possible to be unmoored from the past’s deep roots and find a reason to hope again.

 

Cover art:

 

 

Author Bio:

River Jordanis a critically acclaimed novelist and playwright whose unique mixture of southern and mystic writing has drawn comparisons to Sarah Addison Allen, Leif Enger, and Flannery O’Connor. Her previous works include The Messenger of Magnolia Street, lauded by Kirkus Reviews as “a beautifully written, atmospheric tale.” She speaks around the country and makes her home in Nashville.

 

 

 

Book: Stealing Home  

 

Author: Allison Pittman 

It’s 1905 and the Chicago Cubs are banking on superstar Donald “Duke” Dennison’s golden arm to help them win the pennant. Only one thing stands between Duke and an unprecedented ten thousand dollar contract: alcohol.

That’s when sportswriter David Voyant whisks Duke to the one-horse town of Picksville, Missouri, so he can sober up in anonymity. He bides his time flirting with Ellie Jane Voyant, his unofficial chaperone, who would rather hide herself in the railway station ticket booth than face the echoes of childhood taunts.

Ned Clovis, the feed store clerk, has secretly loved Ellie Jane since childhood, but he loves baseball and the Duke almost as much–until he notices Ellie Jane may be succumbing to the star’s charm.

Then there’s Morris, a twelve-year-old Negro boy, whose only dream is to break away from Picksville. When Duke discovers his innate talent for throwing a baseball, Morris might just have found his way out.

Four individuals, each living in haunted isolation, each harboring a secret passion. Providence brings them together. Tragedy threatens to tear them apart. Will love be enough to bring them home?

 

Cover art:

 

 

Author Bio:

Allison Pittman spent seventeen years as a high school English teacher, and then shunned the advice of “experts,” quit her day job and set out to write novels that bring glory to God. She relishes inspiring other writers and leading the theater arts group at her church. She and her husband and three sons live in Universal City, Texas.

 

Author Photo:

Stay at Home/Work at Home Moms May 26, 2009

I have many friends that are stay at home moms but they do part-time work from their homes.  Whether it is selling Pampered Chef, Thirty-One, Mary Kay, Kelly’s Kids, free-lance writing, baking cakes, etc.  There is a fine but sticky line involved in that kind of business because you are viewed as a full-time, stay-at-home mom however you still have responsibilities and obligations to meet for your clients.  Somehow a crazy balancing act takes place and of course the mom guilt sets in regarding time management, finishing tasks, having a successful business and bringing in money but not “taking away” from time with your family.

I really admire these moms because I sold Discovery Toys for a while and I remember that struggle.  I loved having the parties and I loved the products and I loved using a different part of my brain…however the balancing act was a challenge that I didn’t really prepare for well.

Over the past week or so I have enjoyed reading a book by a successful “work-at-home” mom, Mary M. Byers.  I wish I read Making Work at Home Work back when I was selling Discovery Toys.  Byers does a great job at prioritizing simple questions women should ask themselves as they embark on the adventure of working at home for a profit.  They are truly simple questions and concepts but they establish priorities and boundaries to protect your sanity, your marriage, your role as a mother, your time management and your ability to actually succeed and make a profit.

The first half of the book is titled Saving Your Sanity.  It focuses on helping you process through your own reasons for working at-home, communicating with your spouse for a successful partnership and team approach, giving ideas and strategies for child care options and even simple practical solutions for dinner time dilemmas.

The second half of the book helps you work on Preserving Your Profit.  Byers digs in to some real business how-tos like record keeping and deductions, subcontracting, planning ahead, retirement planning and even accepting the fact that you don’t have to know it all to be a success.

The chapters are short and simple and scattered throughout the book are mini-profile/interviews with 13 successful work-at-home moms.  They represent all different kinds of businesses, strategic ideas and lengths of time that they have been “at it.”

Byers succeeds at being down-to-earth, witty, realistic and entertaining.  The book is a quick read and I came away with many practical ideas.  I wish I would have had this earlier in the game because I could relate with the struggles she describes.  Byers succeeds in helping moms ask the hard questions that can lead to some real freedom in setting healthy boundaries which will lead to greater productivity, peace in the home and self-confidence.

So if you are a work-at-home mom, are thinking of becoming one or know someone that could use some encouragement in their pursuit, I highly recommend this book!  Pick it up and you can read it in a few days and gain a lot of insight.  You should be able to find it at your local bookstore or even pick it up online:)

Can’t help myself May 25, 2009

No, this is not a post about chocolate chip cookies, however I could write a post on how I just can’t help myself when it comes to making batches of warm cookies late at night so I can indulge in some midnight sweetness.

Again I digress.  I went from my last post to make sure that I linked correctly to Mark Batterson’s blog and oh my goodness I found this nugget and I just had to share it.  This guy keeps them coming!  He is talking about “finding your voice”.

Another part of finding your voice is getting out of your comfort zone and getting into your confidence zone where you have the courage to say some things that you know might step on some toes. If you want to see people dance, you’ve got to shoot bullets at their feet every now and then! Finding your voice is having the courage to offend. It is saying some things that you know will cause people to say, “You didn’t just say that.” To which we respond, “Oh yes I did.”

Please go read his whole post b/c it is so good, but this snippet just resonated with me.  I love that image of shooting bullets at people’s feet to see them dance.  Gets me fired up:)  I love it!  Anybody else?

Are you a Hero? May 23, 2009

Just finished an AMAZING book!  I love doing blog reviews but this book way exceeded my expectations.  Fred Stoeker and his son Jasen challenge men, young and old, in this book Hero: Becoming the Man She Desires. Fred also wrote Every Man’s Battle and Tactic.  All of these books challenge men to live lives of sexual purity but in Hero the Stoekers work as a team to issue a call for men to rise to God’s challenge to be the leaders and heroes that God created them to be.

Instead of focusing on all the things men should avoid to stays sexually pure they encourage men to leave the women in their lives better for having known them.  They issue the challenge for men to finally stop falling “prey” to their manhood and instead to be in control of their manhood and fulfill the call that the Creator of the universe has on their lives as a man.

This book is simple, inspiring, motivational, down-to-earth and full of Truth.  I am giving it to my youngest brother to read and asked Mark to read it.  I want us to go through it with each of our boys before they start dating.  It is SO GOOD!!!

How exciting would it be if, as parents, we read it and used it as a rite of passage to teach our young men what the REAL TRUTH is about manhood, dating and purity.  And if we made sure the young men that date our daughters also read this and knew the TRUTH that is required of them to truly treat our daughters as a gift and the treasure that they are.  Think about how our pasts would possibly look different if the men in our lives had treated their relationships with women the way Stoeker challenges, to leave us better for having known them.  What heartache and embarrassment and loss we may have avoided.  Or possibly our relationships would have simply been richer and a little less complicated?

I highly, highly recommend this book if you are a parent, have an influence with young people or are a young person.  Can’t say enough good about this book!  I am a bit of a self-help bookaholic, as I have mentioned before, so I have read a LOT of relationship/dating books and this is one of the very best so far!

Below you will find some info on the book itself and the Stoekers.  I so wish I had a book to give away, but I don’t so please, please go check out your local bookstore and pick one up or go to www.randomhouse.com and buy one online!

http://www.randomhouse.com/catalog/display.pperl?isbn=9781400071098&ref=externallink_mlt_hero_kef_0403_01

Book: HERO

Author: Fred Stoeker & Jason Stoeker with contributions by Mike Yorkey

Summary:

You already know it’s not easy being a single man in this culture today. But it is easy to be overwhelmed, to feel helpless and hopeless about living by God’s high standards for singles. It’s easy to cave in to the pressures of this sex-soaked world and accept defeat—blaming the media, the culture, even girlfriends who don’t know how tough it can be.

But many men have read books like Every Young Man’s Battle and Tactics and have committed themselves to stand strong and pure in the power of God, and to go on the offensive against the onslaught of negative stereotypes. Some have suffered. Some have fallen. But many have experienced victory—and you can be among them.

What makes those committed men so desirable to women? Be Her Hero is their motto. From best-selling author Fred Stoeker, along with his son Jasen, come the straightforward insight and real-life examples you’re looking for to help you take personal purity to its logical conclusion. Here’s straight truth with irrefutable evidence of what makes an ultimate hero to women who long for men of faith—men who stand by their convictions and make their world a safer and better place.

Are you ready to accept the challenge?

Cover art:

Author Bios:

Fred Stoeker is a best-selling author of several books, including Every Young Man’s Battle and Tactics, the president of Living True Ministries, and a popular conference speaker who challenges men to become sexually pure, to reconnect in true intimate relationship with their wives, and to train their sons to become godly men. A graduate of Stanford University, Fred lives in Des Moines, Iowa with his wife, Brenda, and their children.

Mike Yorkey, a writer living in Encinitas, California, has collaborated with Fred Stoeker in all his books for the Every Man’s series.

Jasen Stoeker is a popular conference speaker who challenges young men to be heroic in their relationships with women and to be a Christian, rather than just seem like one. Jasen is a graduate of Iowa State University with degrees in Computer Engineering and Computer Science and now lives in Minneapolis, MN, with his wife Rose.