Living not striving…

Random thoughts and daily adventures in my life

Trying to be unselfish April 10, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — erikaivory @ 8:34 pm

Mark is trying so hard to juggle his time.  He is doing extremely well but I know it is hard.  He has to be out of town three nights this week so he wants to spend as much time with his dad as he can, and help out Pat, and be with the boys as much as possible, and get some stuff done at the house, and make sure I am okay.  The list goes on and on.

I find myself getting frustrated at times because he isn’t home or I can’t get in touch with him.  Because I am so used to him being so present and available to my every want and need.  And he is still so there if I need him, but I am learning that I need to be like fifth or sixth on his list during this season.

My selfishness disgusts me.  He is so amazing.  And I am realizing that I need the Lord’s help so I can fill some of the needs the boys have that Daddy usually fills.  Because during this season I really want Mark to be able to do what his heart wants to do.  If he wants to just sit with his dad or mow his dad’s lawn or go grocery shopping with his sister for Pat.  I want him to have the freedom to do what his heart wants to do without guilt for not being somewhere else at that moment.

I am not sure if this makes any sense but I know so many of you really care about what we are feeling and what is going on and how you can pray.  So please pray for balance.  That we each daily fill the roles that the Lord has for us for THAT day.  And that I remain unselfish, moment by moment.


2 Responses to “Trying to be unselfish”

  1. jennypruitt Says:

    Hey girl.. I WILL be praying for you. It is SOO difficult with your husband not being able to be around as much… trust me… I have been there… still am. But..through prayer and trying to think of HIM and him (my husband) FIRST helps… also… i really make this my motto…”Expectations bread Frustrations”….sometimes… if I don’t EXPECT that Chris will be here for dinner …. or I’ll don’t expect that he will be able to help; with the kids ALL day long and I’ll have to do everything for that day… if I go ahead and just not expect it… there is never that disappointment when he can’t make those events….AND there is that sweet RELIEF and utter surprise when he does actually get off early… there is an appreciation for him being able to be there…so I suppose the flip side of that quote could be..”No Expectations bring great appreciations!!!”…sorry for the long comment…I just know how this can be… and you can truly be and are the joy of your husband–esp. during this difficult time. I’ll be praying for you.

  2. jennypruitt Says:

    sorry… just realized I misspelled “breed”..I wrote bread….. i mean.. “expectations BREED frustrations…” ok… just wanted to clarify…

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